Serious

I've done some amazing things in the past week. So far, I've been to Bondi Beach and climbed on the rocks. I've walked around the city of Sydney and eaten great gelato as well as see the Sydney Opera house (which is absolutely GORGEOUS). I've walked home singing in the rain. I went to an incredible retreat for young adults with eye-opening speakers and thick, powerful worship. I ate more fruit than I have in my whole life. I've gone to an insane crazy dance party. I've met students from several nations. I've watched fireworks from the Sydney harbor. I've slept on the beach for a few hours (before being rained out and having to sleep in the car. Sort of a bust, but I still saw an amazing sunrise). I've had incredible conversations with my wonderful, faith-filled housemates. 

But besides all this, it truthfully has been really hard. I knew it would be, but as much as you can brace yourself for something doesn't mean you won't feel the full effects of it. My emotions have been on an extreme roller coaster. I miss my family terribly. I miss laying on the coach at home. I miss my church. I miss my best friends. I miss it all. I hate talking on the phone to my parents because I practically break down in tears each time we speak.

However, in the transition and insanity and adjustments, the Lord has already started to work so much on my heart. The retreat was so huge for helping get my mind on Him and off myself. The moment I got to college and started meeting students, I became extremely insecure. Every outfit I regretted. Every hair do wasn't enough. I felt like a dork having to wear my glasses constantly to let my eye heal from a flame-up last Sunday. 

But as I let the Lord minister to me at the retreat, I really felt him telling me how much he valued me and how he hated when I compared myself to others. Because I can't be compared to anyone else. He loves me just as I am and wants to use me just as I am. His plans for me are so much bigger than the ones I have for myself and I can't put him in a box.

I made a promise for this year that this is the year I'm getting serious about the Lord. Serious about him being in every aspect of my life. Serious about depending on him more than ever before, despite what I feel or the circumstances that present themselves to me. 

In Job 42:5 it says, "My ears had heard of you but now my eyes have seen you."

The Lord is taking me to the next level in our relationship, but that means I have to go to the next level in my devotion. To see his face, I must seek it. Above all else, I have to continue to establish time and intimacy with him because that is the only thing that keeps me grounded and secure.

I don't know what the year holds or what the future brings, but I know who holds this year and who brings the future. I will hold fast to his promise and his word. I know he will never leave me, nor forsake me.

"God is good and will only ever do good." -Steve Penny 

Every day I'm here, God confirms more and more that he wants me here and things get better and better. The Lord has only GOOD things planned for me and I am open to whatever he wants to do. To him be ALL the honor and glory and praise and worship.

"Take the world, but give me Jesus."

xx

L